you really don't understand

should i say this,

or could you please understand,

or should i explain more,

i am not asking you to remember my kindness,

i am not asking you to say thank you,

i am not asking you to tell people about what i've done for you.

i just wanted you to stop talking bad things about me.

my precious mum knows all the pain i bear.

but she never know bad things about you, indeed,

i told her every sweet moments we had,

and she never know the sorrow i hide,

until my tears falls on her shoulder last night.

she was shocked,

she said that i never told her any bad things about you,

but how come this can happen?

so i just want you to know that all these while,

i've been telling my mum that you are one of my best friend,

and i never ever tell any bad things about you even there's lots of wound you left in my heart.

how could you give million litres of blood while i'm giving million litres of honey?

how do you feel when you are telling a good things about a person,

but the person tells bad things about you?

that is the main reason why i feel so depressed.

not because i wanted you to remember all the things i've done for you.

forgive is easy.

i repeat, easy.

i just can't believe what you've said behind me.

when it comes to my final step,

my heart says it is the point where i have to say goodbye to my laughter..

can i give a wide smile?

can i laugh?

these are the hardest thing to do right now.

friendship is like a glass ornament, once it is broken it can rarely be put back together exactly the same way.

it would fine to repeat these words to you again and make you understand more;

i never wanted you to remember my kindness,

i just wanted you to know what friendship really means.